Thank You

Thanks to everyone for their support during my illness. I must however, take no responsibility for any post that was submitted during my recent bout of swine flu.

I really like Family Guy.

Welcome to part 2 of my special seven-part series on Things In Life That Annoy Me. This will be the final installment of my seven part special blog-event and I am happy that we have taken this journey together. I hope that my previous six parts have caused you to take pause and examine what it is in life that truly annoys you.

Today we will be discussing the H1N1 virus, or swine flu, and specifically the American reaction to it. This is a thing in life that truly annoys me. According to the Los Angeles Times, multiple cities across the United States are seeing over a 50% increase in the amount of patients showing up to emergency rooms, complaining of flu-like symptoms. Most people have barely more than a sniffle, and are summarily sent on their way, unless of course, they are truly sick and require medical attention. So why the droves flcoking to the hospital because of a sore throat or runny nose? Because the media loves to scare the ever living daylights out of us. First, they throw around terms like "global pandemic", interspersed with grainy photos of past flu pandemics, only to cut to sound bites of World Health Organization officials predicting worst case scenarios. If that's not enough, their morbid lead-in music and swine-flu graphics suggest we are on the brink of total influenza annihilation. Then they write pieces, wrought with surprise and incredulity, about the explosion in ER visits across the US. It's a media created story that feeds on itself.

Let's look at some very simple facts which took me about 4 minutes to obtain from the government's Center for Disease Control website.

*200,000 Americans require hospitalization every year due to influenza related symptoms

*Most people who are hospitalized are admitted due to respiratory or heart problems

*36,000 Americans die every year from influenza

*5% to 20% of Americans get influenza every year, 15-60 million Americans

*This means the average death rate for influenza is .24% as a worst case scenario. That is less than one quarter of one percent

*Currently, according to the CDC, there are 5,469 cases of confirmed swine flu cases in the US.

*6 Deaths have been confirmed linked to swine flu

*That means the death rate is .1%. One tenth of one percent.

Now I'm not saying that swine flu doesn't pose a health problem for some people. I just think the whole issue is overblown and that many in the media irresponsibly perpetutate a panic atmosphere.

In addition, I myself have come down with a nasty bout of influenza, I guess that's why it's on my mind. But it's no worse than what I've had in previous years and it's actually allowed me to get in touch with old friends from the past, like Jerry Springer, who continues to teach me not to find romance with a hermaphrodite hooker from Honolulu. Thanks Jerry.

And thanks to all of you, for engaging with me in this seven-part blog series on Things In Life That Annoy Me.

Part One

Welcome to my in-depth, seven part series on "Trivial Things in Life That Annoy Me". In part one, we will be exploring grocery stores, specifically grocery store self-scan checkout lines and the irritating people that occupy them. This is a trivial thing in life that annoys me.

Do you remember where you were when you saw, for the first time, an automated self-checkout lane at a grocery store? Well me neither. But I do remember thinking, "Wow! This is fantastic. Now I don't have to wait for the cashier to scan the items at his or her own pace, (which usually hovered somewhere between slow and 'dear god does this person have a pulse'), my grocery scanning destiny had been placed squarely in my hands." It was a new world for this perishable pabulum purchaser.

Fast forward to last evening at 8:04pm. I'm in line, once again having chosen the self-checkout lane. I think maybe this will go quickly but succeed in only deceiving myself. There are four checkout lanes and all four are occupied. Lane number 1 is being used by a large woman who has decided to pay her 12 dollar tab with 88 nickels and a phenomenal amount of pennies. This lane will receive its next customer around midnight. On to lane number 2, where a middle-aged man is staring blankly at the screen in front of him. It's beeping and yelling at him, in that calm, digital manner that computers often do and in a moment, the man will turn, perplexed at this maddening piece of technology, and search for human help. But I've moved on to lane 3, where a mother of seven is able to scan items roughly every 90 seconds, in between shouts and stammers at her children which are met with retorts of shrieks and screams. It's an escalating crescendo of exchange with no clear victor in sight. My final option is lane 4 and it holds for me the promise of escape. What it doesn't hold is enough receipt tape to issue the customer ahead of me a receipt. So I waited, and waited and waited some more. Eventually I made it out, with all 12 of my grocery items and enough material for installment one of my special seven part series on Trivial Things in Life That Annoy Me.

If you would like to be a part of this special seven part series, please feel free to email me at benjaminkroll@gmail.com or comment to this post with the Trivial Things in Life That Annoy You.

Congratulations Hollywood

Congratulations to Hollywood. Who finally, after 7 years of quality filmmaking famine, turned out a real good movie. Suprisingly, they came through by updating the classic geek-fest catalyst Star Trek and turned it into an exciting thrill ride worthy of mention in a luadable "According to Me" post.

Many other things happened this weekend. Most of them you probably don't even give a damn about. However, I will write about them and you will read about them. This is the cliffhanger portion of the blog post, the part which keeps you yearning and returning for more. Until then... live long and prosper.

More for you

Another really bad movie I saw was "He's Just Not That In To You". If you haven't seen it, do something to better yourself rather than waste 2 hours feeling uncomfortable.

Angels and Demons

Angels and Demons better be good. I mean really good. Hollywood has made a bunch of crap the past year, starting with that Will Smith bore-fest 7 Pounds. There's been some other really bad ones too and I'd prefer not to go into it.

Hi

Just wanted to say hi to everyone! Hope everyone is doing well and thanks for reading the blog. I'm currently in Florida right now, on one of my marathon tours through the state and hopefully I'll be back before midnight. Really it depends on the weather. If it's too bad I'll stop in Panama City on the way back and stay the night. If not, I'll push through to Atlanta. I'll have more later...

0425

0413 and I have a few things to say.

One, I can type very fast for someone that cannot touch type. However, when it comes to typing in the dark, everything changes.

Two, I am training myself to use only military time. I think we all know why this is important.

Three, I think this whole swine flu thing is a joke. Apparently, it's a mild strain of an influenza virus that is not transmittable through the air. So really, you have to cough on someone to give it to them. And if they get it, life will become very uncomfortable for a few days. And maybe, without proper care or they're under 3 or over 70, it could be as potentially fatal as any other flu bug out there. In short, this giant media hype has about as much chance of really affecting (or is it effecting? any English majors I could use a little help there) me as aw hell, I lost my point. Cut me some slack, it's 0418.

Four, I have a wonderful fiancee who makes me laugh from the time I get up to 3 minutes before I fall asleep. Make sure you have someone in your life who does that for you.

Hope everyone has a great day and don't worry about the swine flu. In fact, don't worry about much at all today.